Want to go home

This human condition is not worth it. I've never been more alone. This weak body, sensitive flesh, and go nowhere existence. I want to go home. Humans with their entitlement issues, ignorance, and selfishness. I've tried to be mundane. I've tried to be normal. I'm tired now. Tired of working hard for nothing, exceeding expectations and getting nowhere, being the go to person and no getting results. I don't understand this society. Too much striving for approval for no reward. I don't understand. I'm different, rational, compassionate, and honest. I've tried and failed to become part of this superficial, materialistic, prejudice world. The experiment should be over. I want for the lush jungles, survival, stress free, relaxed and meaningful living. I want to go home.

Lonely

I wish there were more people in my circle like me. I'm alone. All I have is my husband and lately there's not enough hours in the day. I try to stay up late or get up early so I can be near him so I don't feel alone. It doesn't work. I need someone that can relate to. Someone that's been there or is going through it. I want to talk freely without having to hide. It'll never happen. I'm doomed to be the only one. Eventually it'll get to me really.  I won't have restraint. I'll be too far gone. The dam will come crashing down.